Navigating Alcohol and Substance Use During the Holidays

The holidays can be a time of connection, celebration, and reflection — but for many adults, they also bring unique pressures around alcohol and substance use. Whether it’s navigating family dynamics, social expectations, or the stress of year-end responsibilities, it’s easy to find yourself drinking or using more than intended.

Here in Marin and the Bay Area, where social gatherings often center around wine, cocktails, or cannabis, it can take real intention to stay grounded and care for yourself through the season.

Below are some strategies to help you stay mindful, reduce stress, and make choices that align with your well-being.

Set an Intention Before Events

Before heading to a holiday party or family gathering, take a moment to decide what you want your night to look like.

• Do you want to drink at all?

• If so, how much feels right for you?Setting a clear intention — and even telling a trusted friend or partner — helps create accountability and supports mindful choices.

  
  

Tip: Want to blend in without drinking? Order a bubbly water with bitters and lime, NA beer, or even water with a fancy garnish. No one will think twice, and you’ll have a drink in hand that helps you feel part of the crowd.

Have a Plan for Triggers

For many, the holidays can bring up emotions like loneliness, grief, or overwhelm — all of which can be powerful triggers for drinking or using.

• Identify the situations, people, or feelings that tend to lead you toward substances.

• Create an alternative coping plan: take a walk, step outside for a few breaths, text a supportive friend, or bring a non-alcoholic drink you enjoy to the party.

  
  

Tip: If a certain person or situation tends to be stressful and triggering, plan your exit strategy ahead of time — drive yourself, have a set “end time,” or arrange a check-in text with someone you trust. Having that small safety net can make the evening feel more manageable, remind you you've got options, and help to de-escalate anxiety.

Explore “Mindful Drinking” or “Cannabis Curiosity”

You don’t have to be completely sober to practice mindfulness around substance use.

• Notice what draws you to drink or use — is it relaxation, connection, avoidance?

• Tune into your body as you consume — how does it feel before, during, and after?

• Experiment with pacing, alternating drinks with water, or skipping some events altogether.

Mindful awareness can shift your relationship with substances from automatic to intentional.

Tip: Try a simple mindfulness cue: before your first sip or inhale, pause and take one deep breath. Ask yourself, “What am I hoping this will do for me right now?” That one breath can transform an unconscious habit into a moment of choice.

Find Connection Without Substances

Many people find that what they actually crave during the holidays isn’t the drink or the high — it’s connection. Try scheduling time with friends in substance-free ways:

• Morning walks, hikes, or yoga classes (Marin has beautiful trails and community offerings).

• Volunteering or helping others, which can bring a sense of meaning and grounding.

• Hosting a mocktail night or cozy dinner with warm tea and good conversation.

  
  

Tip: Try making a signature mocktail to share. Mix sparkling water, cranberry juice, and a sprig of rosemary or mint, or warm up some mulled apple cider — it looks festive and tastes great. You might be surprised how many others will skip the alcohol too once they see the option.

Reach Out for Support

If you notice that drinking or using is becoming harder to manage, you’re not alone — and support can help. Many people reassess their relationship with substances around this time of year. Talking with a therapist can help you explore the emotional roots of use, build coping skills, and rediscover balance in your life.

At Big Life Change, our therapists support individuals and couples who want to develop healthier relationships with alcohol, cannabis, and other substances — without judgment and at your own pace.

Tip: You don’t have to wait for a “rock bottom” moment to reach out. Even one conversation with a therapist can help you clarify what’s working, what’s not, and what kind of support could help you feel more grounded this season.

You Don’t Have to Navigate the Holidays Alone

If you’d like support this season — whether that’s setting boundaries, reducing use, or finding new ways to cope — our team is here to help.Reach out today to schedule a free consultation or learn more about how therapy can support you during the holidays and into the new year.

Frances Cameron, AMFT is a dedicated therapist passionate about helping those dealing with substance issues. You can read more about her here and reach her at Frances@biglifechangetherapy.com.